I recently stumbled upon an article on "10 ways to flirt" (or something like that) on Yahoo's links. Being married, and happily married at that, I just read it out of curiosity, because I thought, I should be very careful not to do this, and not to respond when it is done to me. I realized that these "flirting tips" are dangerous traps for married people if they respond to the flirting of another person (not their spouse). They are "The Kiss of Death". They are not exciting, they are lethal. The flirting tips I read were all about body language, meaning letting your body movements speak your "intention". Married people should run away from such things! Why? Because that's where the sin of adultery starts. Flirting with other people is not harmless.
When I was single I had always wondered what the meaning of the Lord Jesus' teaching on adultery was:
Matt 5:27-28
"You have heard that it was said, 'Do not commit adultery.' But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.
What it means is that the very start of adultery is "the look" of lust, where one just sexually desires the other person who is not one's spouse. That may be when one looks and stares with sexual desire at another person, whether "within reach"(meaning someone you know or meet) or not. When one is looking lustfully at an image or a video of a person who is not physically present before you, it is still adultery. But when that person is physically present before you, and "within reach", so to speak, flirting is the expression of that desire.
Someone may try to flirt with you, whether you are a man or a woman. It may be a co-worker,or an equal. It may be that you are the one in power (the boss or the superior) or you are the subordinate. The subordinate may be attracted to the power or intelligence of the boss, while the boss may be taking advantage of a subordinate. Remember, flirting is NOT HARMLESS. It is THE KISS OF DEATH.
How will you be victorious? Through God's help.
Submit to God AND resist the devil, who comes to steal, kill and destroy. The devil is not out to just tickle or annoy you. He is out to kill and destroy you. And he means business 'cause he hates God so much.
Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.
James 4:7
Always be wise in the Lord's wisdom, always apply God's wisdom in your life.
Proverbs 2:16-19 has this to say about wisdom:
It [wisdom] will save you also from the adulteress, from the wayward wife with her seductive words, who has left the partner of her youth and ignored the covenant she made before God. For her house leads down to death and her paths to the spirits of the dead. None who go to her return or attain the paths of life.
"Seductive words" sounds like flirting, right? And that goes for spoken words or words in text messages! The word of God says that the adulteress' house leads down to death.
Keep God's commands in your heart, for they will guide you and keep you from immoral people. As Proverbs 6:23-26 says:
For these commands are a lamp, this teaching is a light, and the corrections of discipline are the way to life,
keeping you from the immoral woman, from the smooth tongue of the wayward wife.
Do not lust in your heart after her beauty or let her captivate you with her eyes,
for the prostitute reduces you to a loaf of bread, and the adulteress preys upon your very life.
"Smooth tongue" sounds like flattery in flirting, and "captivate you with her eyes" describes the "body language" of flirting. Yet the word of God says that the adulteress "preys upon your very life". He or she may present himself as an emotionally needy person, but in reality your very life is the devil's target here.
The verses following give a stern warning on the consequences of adultery:
Proverbs 6:27-33
Can a man scoop fire into his lap without his clothes being burned?
Can a man walk on hot coals without his feet being scorched?
So is he who sleeps with another man's wife; no one who touches her will go unpunished.
Men do not despise a thief if he steals to satisfy his hunger when he is starving.
Yet if he is caught, he must pay sevenfold, though it costs him all the wealth of his house.
But a man who commits adultery lacks judgment; whoever does so destroys himself.
Blows and disgrace are his lot, and his shame will never be wiped away.
